Life as a Rock Star…and a Gay Man
Chuck Panozzo Chronicles the Journey of Styx and
His Struggle for Self-Acceptance
THE GRAND ILLUSION
"Styx's fans will enjoy Panozzo's detailed look at the band's internal conflicts as they rise from small Chicago bars to sold-out arenas. But the heart of Panozzo's autobiography is a sensitive and insightful look at 'one gay man's struggle to come to terms with himself' while performing in a rock world where 'the things that would make the other guys laugh—a female fan lifting up her skirt, a pair of panties thrown on stage—just didn't do it’ for him." —Publishers Weekly
Tune into any Classic Rock station in America and you’ll hear their hits—“Lady,” “Renegade,” “Come Sail Away,” “Fooling Yourself,” “Babe.” With record sales surpassing 54 million, including a record-setting four consecutive triple platinum albums, Styx is one of the biggest rock bands of the 20th century. What’s more, after almost four decades together, Styx is still touring and thrilling sold-out crowds.
A founding member of Styx and its iconic bass player, Chuck Panozzo remembers what it was like on the road to success, riding between local gigs in the back of a station wagon, and at the peak of his fame, playing before thousands of screaming female fans and torrents of panties, bras, and propositions. He also recalls the loneliness and gnawing fear of being found out and exposed as a gay man. He tells the story of his struggle to come to terms with himself while navigating a rock ‘n’ roll odyssey in THE GRAND ILLUSION: Love, Lies, and My Life with Styx(AMACOM; May 15, 2007; $24.95 Hardcover).
“Fortunately, I am now comfortable enough in my own skin to take a stand on my own behalf,” Panozzo reflects. “But I know that there are thousands of others who are not. For them, I hope to be an example. For them, I hope to help break down the stigma and stereotypes that still surround not only the gay community, but also many other groups and individuals who feel disenfranchised.”
THE GRAND ILLUSION begins on the South Side of Chicago. Born in 1948 to hardworking and devoutly Catholic second-generation Italian-immigrants, Chuck was his mother’s only son for exactly 20 minutes. Then his twin brother, John, made his entrance. Growing up, Chuck was reserved and compliant, while John routinely raised hell. Teased at school for “running like a girl,” Chuck felt worthless—until he discovered his talent for making music. At age 10, the Panozzo twins started music lessons, taught by their Uncle Tony. John was a natural drummer. Though it took Chuck a few months, he found his instrument: the rhythm guitar. At age 13, the Panozzo twins formed a trio with their neighbor, 15-year-old Dennis DeYoung, and quickly became popular on the local wedding/party circuit. Thanks to a bit of almost divine intervention—savvy advice from a nun—the boys dumped their Sinatra repertoire to focus on playing rock ‘n’ roll. After an unlikely detour—a year in the seminary—Chuck came back playing bass guitar with John and Dennis and working on building a rock band.
THE GRAND ILLUSION presents a backstage pass to the journey of one of the world’s most successful bands, while tracing the awakening of a gay man to his own sexual identity. Chuck recounts:
- The birth of Styx, including how the band got its name, in 1970, and the hungry years with Wooden Nickel records, a local label notorious for spending next to nothing on promoting its artists.
- Styx’s breakout into the national spotlight—propelled by the pledge of Chicago radio station WLS to play “Lady” every night at 8 p.m. until it became a hit.
- His strategy of reflecting an Italian tough-guy persona on stage to hide his lack of interest in all the female attention—and his covert schemes to find and sneak out to gay bars while on tour.
- The tensions of creative differences, provoked by Dennis DeYoung’s penchant for high-concept theatrics, and his brother John’s tragic, self-destructive, and ultimately fatal alcohol addiction.
- The break up of Styx, the blow of being diagnosed as HIV positive, and his long battles with denial and depression.
- His comeback performance with Styx, his healing decision to tell the band about his second dreaded diagnosis, with AIDS, and how the death of a friend spurred him to publicly come out as a gay man.
Still the bass player for Styx, Chuck Panozzo now lives as an openly gay man, in a committed loving relationship, and is an activist for HIV/AIDS education and gay rights. “I’ve been given the opportunity to make a difference,” says Panozzo. “I do not take that opportunity lightly.”
Filled with insider revelations, THE GRAND ILLUSION will strike a chord with fans of Styx and anyone fascinated by the true tales of rock legends. At its heart, however, Chuck Panozzo’s memoir is a testament to the power and peace of self-acceptance, certain to resonate with not only gay and lesbian readers, but anyone who has ever felt different or had difficulty accepting their true identity.
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About the Author
CHUCK PANOZZO is the bass player for and a founding member of Styx. Since 2001, he has been involved in campaigning for HIV/AIDS awareness and gay rights. He lives in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, with his partner, Tim. MICHELE SKETTINO is a professional writer. Based in New York City, she has worked in the music and entertainment industry since 1989.
